National Maternal Mental Health Hotline - 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262)
Call or Text 1-833-943-5746 (English and Spanish) – 24/7, Free, Confidential Hotline for before, during and after pregnancy. Offers resources, referrals and support. Interpreter Services are available in 60 languages. (US Only)
** Mind In the Making - Website sharing the research, tools and strategies based on Ellen Galinsky's book about the "Seven Essential Life Skills" children (and adults) need to succeed in life -- 1) Focus and Self-Control, 2) Perspective Taking, 3) Communicating, 4) Making Connections (categorizing, the core of creativity), 5) Critical Thinking, 6) Taking on Challenges, 7) Self-Directed, Engaged Learning. The Mind in the Making program helps adults better understand how children learn, what they need to learn and how adults can take simple, effective steps to promote engaged learning of executive functioning skills.
Tip Sheets to help parents with the skills broken down by developmental stage
Ellen Galinsky's article with the Families and Work Institute - "Bringing the Outside Inside" - creating an inside playground to facilitate learning (May 12, 2020).
Center on the Developing Child (from Harvard)
Child Development Institute offers articles and resources on various topics, including "Healthy Meals for Kids," Dad's Corner (addressing meltdowns, homework battles, routines and more), and Family Finances.
Does Your Child Have an Unhealthy Relationship to Social Media? Here’s How to Tell. The New York Times (May 23, 2023).
"Screened Out" - A 70-min documentary on how our use of screens and social media is altering our attention and children's brain and social-emotional development. *** Highly Recommend!!. See below for longer description.
Burnout. It's real. It's okay to feel it.
Parental Burnout Self-Test by Catherine Pearson from the NYTimes. (June 6, 2022). Accessed 02.03.23.
Burnout Isn’t Just in Your Head. It’s in Your Circumstances by Adam Grant in The New York Times (March 19, 2020). Accessed 10.17.23.
Post-Partum Depression -- See separate page on Reproductive, Perinatal, Postpartum resources
Smart Patients' Post Partum Community - @smartpatientscommunity - an online forum for women affected by #PPD
Getting back into the workforce
Divorce and Separation
FamilyKind's PEAP Program (Parenting Education & Awareness Program) - support for navigating separation & divorce process, co-parenting, etc.
Sesame Workshop (Sesame Street)'s "Sesame Street in Communities" Resource Hub
Dealing with Divorce & Separation
Video: Adjusting to Two Homes
Video: Abby Cadabby Shares Her Experience with her Parents' Divorce
Splitting time between two homes
Video reading of the book "My Two Homes" by Claudia Harrington
Introducing a new partner
Developmental Regression
Acting Out in School
Meltdowns & Discipline
Parent Handout: Truths about Time Out from PCIT (Parent-Child Interactive Therapy) International
See below sections on "Videos" and "Mindfulness" for help with emotion regulation and mindfulness, and YouTube videos of books read aloud, like "Voices Are Not for Yelling," "Gorilla Taps" (EMDR for Kids), the Angry Spot (A Little Spot of Emotion Series) | Hands Are Not For Hitting (book read aloud)
See "How to Talk so Kids Will Listen," and the resources from the Child Development and Child Mind Institutes.
Routines
Screentime
See "Screened Out" (link above) - a short documentary under the Relationships and Addictions resources.
Pregnancy and Infant Loss (PAIL)
Please see the Grief & Loss Resource Page for more.
Postpartum Support International (PSI), NY Chapter - Offers a network of perinatal mental health specialists, a hotline, support groups, resources, advocacy, research, counseling and community to support pregnant women, their families and providers during and after pregnancy. Support groups specific to a range of identities and focii including Dads, Parenting after Loss, Pregnancy after Stillbirth and Loss, Black Moms in Loss, Birth Moms Support, Birth Trauma for BIPOC Families and Pregnancy Mood Support.
PSI Helpline: call or text 1-800-944-4773 | en Español: 971-203-7773 | Instagram | Support Groups | Queer & Trans Parent Support | Online Provider Directory
RTZ HOPE - Support for the LGBTQI+ bereaved parents community.
(Helping kids with Pet Loss)
When a Pet Dies, Helping Children Through the ‘Worst Day of Their Lives’ by Juli Fraga in The New York Times. (June 8, 2017).
Sesame Street Sesame Workshop - Community videos and resources on Grief
The Invisible Leash: An Invisible String Story About the Loss of a Pet by Patricia Karst and Joanne Lew-Vriethoff
Losing a Pet — How to Help Your Toddler Deal With Death from What to Expect (Jan. 24, 2019).
Picture Books recommended in article:
"I'll Always Love You" by Hans Wilhelm
Dog Heaven and Cat Heaven by Cynthia Rylant
See additional Grief Resources here.
Sensory Overload & Emotion Regulation
Growing Hands-On - a resource to better understand Sensory Processing & Emotion regulation challenges. Here's a 2-min video and longer description/guide to help your child learn coping & self-regulation skills, "When I Feel Overwhelmed."
Helping a teenager (or pre-teen) with substance abuse
Helping a child questioning their sexuality, gender identity - Resources from MyKidisGay.com
PFLAG - For parents & caregivers seeking support for LGBTQI+ identified or questioning children
The Trevor Project - resources, direct support, tools and advocacy for mental health for teens grappling with their gender & sexuality identity. Also has 24-7 crisis support line -- see above sections.
GLSEN - Resources, education, advocacy and support for LGBTQ+ youth/teens in K-12 education
Helicopter Parenting and Over-Achievement
Organizational Psychologist Adam Grant, a professor at the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania, TED speaker, author, Work Life podcast host, and supplier of great social media quick bites of info to help you thrive at work and life. He's a regular on LinkedIn, and has written many articles you can see here.
Productivity Isn’t About Time Management. It’s About Attention Management, The New York Times (March 28, 2019).
Can your job make you a more controlling parent? When we are robbed of freedom at work, we expect more obedience at home. Salon.com (July 15, 2018).
Stop Trying to Raise Successful Kids, And start raising kind ones. The Atlantic (Dec. 2019).
When your kids prefer one parent over the other --- this is a normal developmental behavior! It's hard to not take it personally. Here are some articles and food for thought:
NYTimes - "Why Does My Kid Prefer My Partner? (Published 2020)" by Jessica Grose. Accessed 02.03.23.
ABC Everyday.com. Why kids can prefer one parent (and tips for dealing with it), by Richard Scott. Accessed 02.03.23
Morning Struggles
NYTimes - "Why Kids Fight Getting Dressed: Every morning is a living nightmare," (Jan. 15 2020). Accessed 02.03.23.
Potty Training
Potty Training articles and resources from WhatToExpect.com
Social-Emotional Development
Learning about Emotions & Feelings
See the "A Spot of Feelings" series below and in the Mindfulness section.
Sesame Workshop, eg. The Feelings Garden
Sesame Workshop has a plethora of resources on social-emotional development, parenting, health & wellness, grief, relationships, self-care and more.
The Boundaries Song | Listening Song (song and activity for listening skills and following directions)| How To Respect Personal Space - Bay Needs Space (book read aloud, to help learn to identify your own and others' emotions, with an Australian accent!)
Unwanted Behaviors - Dr. Becky at "Good Inside" - Instagram post on What to Tell Your Kid to do rather than not to do. She also is a great resource in general on how manage your own emotions and feelings while helping your child manage "big emotions." She has a great TEDx talk on Repair, which is a necessary skill & process for you to develop and practice when you've yelled, lost your temper, had an argument, etc.
Guided Mindfulness and Meditations - see below section for more audio & video guides like "Let's Unwind: Flow," Belly Breathing (kids ages 5-11) , Bear Breaths (for anxiety and overwhelm), The Body Scanner (ages 3-11)
Mental Health Center Kids - Helps children and teens learn to manage feelings and big emotions like anger, anxiety (and can help parents learn these skills too!) - Coping Skills for Kids - Managing Feelings & Emotions For Elementary-Middle School Self-Regulation
EMDR For Kids - EMDR techniques to help them self-soothe and manage anxiety, anger, overwhelm and symptoms of trauma - Gorilla Taps
Children's books read with visuals on YouTube: See below section, Kids' Books.
Dr. Becky Kennedy
Guide to Running a Successful Family Meeting - download link
Podcast: Good Inside with Dr. Becky - Apple
Pendulum Parenting: When you try so hard to parent differently than the way you were raised but accidentally swing to the other end of the pendulum. This week, Dr. Becky talks with one of the hosts of the We Can Do Hard Things podcast, Amanda Doyle, about holding clear boundaries while raising kids in a family where it's important that all feelings be allowed.
New Mom Self-Care: 16 Ways to Take Care of Your Mental Healht in Early Parenthood, from Zencare. Accessed 8.31.23.
Does Your Child Have an Unhealthy Relationship to Social Media? Here’s How to Tell. The New York Times (May 23, 2023).
Compromising When You Have Different Parenting Styles - TwoOfUs.org
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk (2012) by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish.
Mind In the Making (2010) by Ellen Gallinsky.
Shows what you can do from birth through middle school to strengthen the critical executive function skills in children so they develop an ability to problem solve, get along with others and achieve goals. Provides tools to help foster your relationship and the skills including Critical Thinking, Taking on Challenges, Focus & Self-Control, Perspective Taking, Communicating, Making Connections, and Self-Directed Engaged Learning,
Mind In the Making Website with Fact Sheets, activities, tools and research.
** Quick Tip Resources & Handouts in English & Spanish.
These are particularly helpful ideas for in-home activities and games that help you foster your kids' development and address challenges in age-appropriate ways. Issues from sharing to potty training, to completing homework, to listening to directions, to connecting with others, to bullying and more.
Skill-Building Opportunities & Tip Sheets
Daniel Siegel & Tina Payne
Two leading researchers on parenting and children's social, emotional, cognitive development.
Daniel Siegel's Website | Amazon Page
No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind by and Tina Payne Bryson. Daniel Siegel has a series of books on child development, emotional development and parenting. This book (and Whole Brained Child) also have workbooks. - Amazon Link
Parening from the Inside Out
3-min Guided mindfulness exercise for kids (Audio) - Ammi's Adventures: Stones. Mindful.com. (9/6/22).
4-min Grounding (Audio) - meditation for kids. Mindful.com. (2/7/22).
Butterfly Hug! 6-Mins. Self-Soothing technique for kids
Guided Square Breathing (grounding technique for anxiety, anger, overwhelm, PTSD from Learn and Play Right Brain Education)
The "Spot of Emotions" book series is available on YouTube - see below section on children's books: The Feelings Detective Song | A Little Calm Spot (Calm & Focus) | A Little Spot of Feelings (The Emotion Detective)
GoNoodle 's (link to their main website) - 3-4mins. - "Get Back on Track Meditation" | "Melting Exercise - Learn To Destress." | "Let's Unwind: Flow" | "Brain Break - Elemental Fitness Run" | Swirling
** these can be great for adults too!
NamasteInSchool - videos to foster social-emotional learning and mindfulness skills - "Bear Breaths" | "Snow Breaths" | Sloth Mindful Breathing Yoga Exercise
Scratch Garden: 5-Min. Yoga Breaks - Salamander Yoga! |Salamander Yoga - Now with Tiny Flying Alligators!
Growing Hands-On - a resource to better understand Sensory Processing & Emotion regulation challenges - 2-min: When I Feel Overwhelmed
Mental Health Center Kids - Helps children and teens learn to manage feelings and big emotions like anger, anxiety (and can help parents learn these skills too!) - Coping Skills for Kids - Managing Feelings & Emotions For Elementary-Middle School Self-Regulation | Anger Management Techniques For Kids and Teens - Strategies To Calm Down When Your Temper Rises (skills that are also used with adults; I recommend slowing the video down)|
TFC: The Feelings Channel - Books and Games to help kids manage and learn about emotions. Feelings Freeze Dance | How To Tame My Anxiety Monster (book read aloud, identifies the physical symptoms and coping skills) | Little Monkey Calms Down | The Emotions Book | The Feelings Book | Feelings A to Z
What Shall We Do With The Angry Monster? (more for toddlers, will be best to view together and add your own description).
Shake Off Those Icky Feelings: 7-Minute Emotion Regulating Activity To Help Kids Calm Down [with mindful breathing techniques]
The Mindfulness Teacher - (who doesn't love a British accent? :) ) Belly Breathing (recommended for kids ages 5-11) | The Body Scanner (ages 3-11) | Thought Bubbles! (For Anxiety and Worry)
See above sections on Videos of book read aloud, Mindfulness Guides, Divorce...
When a Donut Goes to Therapy by Erin Winters (Jan. 2022). Amazon | Read aloud on YouTube
The Invisible String by Patrice Karst - a book about connection that helps kids cope with separation anxiety, loss, grief, and general struggles with object permanency.
Me and My Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Understanding and Expressing Themselves. An illustrated chapter book that is great for parents to read with their kids to help learn to identify and express the emotions both with others and with themselves.
The What If's by Emily Kilgore (2020) - A beautifully illustrated book about anxiety for kids 4-8 yo kids that I often use in sessions with adults! Amazon | Barnes & Noble. It is read aloud on YouTube here.
Thank You Mind: Understanding My Big Feelings on Tricky Days by Jennifer Cohen Harper. This book helps kids identify their emotions, and develop the habit of positive self-talk by speaking to themselves with compassion. Also, its illustrations are racially and culturally diverse.
A Little SPOT of Anger: A Story About Managing BIG Emotions (2019). It's read aloud by the author on YouTube here.
"The Little SPOT" series also comes with little stuffed toys and a feelings poster for all of the 8 Emotions - Amazon
8-Book Box Set (#1-8) on Amazon (Anger, Anxiety, Peaceful, Happiness, Sadness, Confidence, Love & Scribble Emotion)
8-Book Box Set on Amazon , -- They are also read aloud on YouTube: (A Little Spot of Feelings (The Emotion Detective), Empathy, Happiness, Optimism, Compromise, Frustration, Perseverance, Calm & Focus, Patience, Anxiety, Sadness, Belonging, Honesty, Worry, Boredom, Courage, Flexible Thinking, , Confidence, Thankful, Sleepy, Organization, A Little Spot Goes to School)
My Body Sends a Signal: Helping Kids Recognize Emotions and Express Feelings (2020), by Natalia Maguire - Also includes activity cards you can rip out to help kids learn in an interactive way. Recommended for ages 3-7. Also, its illustrations are racially and culturally diverse. | It is also read aloud on YouTube here.
Some Days I Flip My Lid: Learning to Be a Calm, Cool Kid (2019) by Kellie Bailey. Helps kids learn about calming themselves down, which is essential to allow them to then make decisions about how to manage their emotions, communicate with others and self-soothe.
Breathe Like a Bear: 30 Mindful Moments for Kids to Feel Calm and Focused Anytime, Anywhere by Kira Willey. Beautifully illustrated book to help kids learn deep breathing and mindfulness practice in an age-appropriate way.
A World of Pausabilities: An Exercise in Mindfulness by Frank Sileo & Jennifer Zivoin (Feb. 13, 2017).
Elmo Is Mindful: How to Stay Focused, Calm, and Kind (2021) by Sesame Street Wellness.
Vooks (narrated and animated story books) - We Are (Not) Friends! |Little Sock Makes A Friend | It Is (Not) Perfect! | That's (Not) Mine! | I Am (Not) Scared | But First, We Nap! | Shopping With Daddy! | Made for Me! (Father & Son Story, so cute) | Ronnie and His Grit! | Finding Free Fun | Little Sock! | Dragons Love Tacos | A Pet Like No Other!
The What If's by Emily Kilgore (2020) - A beautifully illustrated book about anxiety for kids 4-8 yo kids that I often use in sessions with adults! Amazon | It is read aloud on YouTube here.
Reading Pioneers Academy has classic books and others like "Kindness is My Superpower."
The Feelings Channel - see below
How To Respect Personal Space - Bay Needs Space (book read aloud, to help learn to identify your own and others' emotions, with an Australian accent!)
Reading with KiKi - Voices Are Not for Yelling | Hands Are Not For Hitting
The "Spot of Emotions" book series is available on YouTube (see below in the books for kids section): The Feelings Detective Song, and another song with all the spots: How Are You Feeling Song
What to Expect From Couples Therapy. Lifehacker.com. (June 10, 2013).
When to Seek Help: 6 Signs a Relationship Is Unhealthy. Psychology Today. (June 1, 2022).
The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling. From the Gottman Institute.
See below for a 2-min video describing the 4 Horsemen.
4 Anxious Attachment Strategies That Sabotage Intimate Relationships on KyleBenson.net
Why Some of Us Overlook Red Flags in Toxic Relationships. Psychology Today (Jan. 2, 2023).
How to Set Boundaries with Yourself. Psychology Today (Jan. 1, 2023).
When I Get That Boring Feeling: Sex as Escape from Boredom by Andrew Moynihan in Inquisitive Mind (Feb. 2021).
The Power of Attunement from Parenting Success Network (Jan. 22, 2019).
Finding Emotional Connection/Attunement from All Emotional Matters - Link
Finally set (and stick to) healthy work boundaries on Sanvello's Blog (March 31, 2022).
The Modern Love Podcast from The New York Times. --> It has been turned into a book and TV series!
The Mel Robbins Podcast episode "How to Speak Up for Yourself: Simple Strategies for Being Heard." - Learn about how to set boundaries in friendships, handle criticism, starting hard conversations and dealing with "difficult people."
In long-term relationships, we often expect our beloved to be both best friend and erotic partner. But as Esther Perel argues, good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security and our need for surprise. So how do you sustain desire? With wit and eloquence, Perel lets us in on the mystery of erotic intelligence.
Infidelity is the ultimate betrayal. But does it have to be? Relationship therapist Esther Perel examines why people cheat, and unpacks why affairs are so traumatic: because they threaten our emotional security. In infidelity, she sees something unexpected — an expression of longing and loss. A must-watch for anyone who has ever cheated or been cheated on, or who simply wants a new framework for understanding relationships.
The Growth Marriage. "An Introduction To Anxious Attachment With Kyle Benson" of the Gottman Love Lab
Gottman, J. & Silver, N. (2015). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. - Amazon link
Johnson, S. (2008). Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love. - Amazon Link
Nedra Glover Tawwab:
Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A guide to reclaiming yourself (March 16, 2021), TarcherPerigee.
Drama Free: A Guide to Managing Unhealthy Family Relationships (Feb. 28, 2023), TarcherPerigee.
5 Key Ideas (Audio by author) | Amazon Link | Key Tips in The New York Times (March 8, 2023).
Kerner, I. (2004). She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman. - Amazon Link
Behrendt, G. & Ruotola-Behrendt, A. (2005). It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy. - Amazon
Gottlieb, L. (2010). Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough. - Amazon
Nagoski, E. (2015). Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life. - Amazon
The ADHD Effect on Marriage (2010). by Melissa Orlov. ADHDMarriage.com
Self-Quizzes on Attachment Styles at "The Attachment Project" on Boundaries
TwoOfUs.org
National Healthy Marriage Resource Center - link
The Marriage Minute is an email newsletter from The Gottman Institute.